I’m Not Normal and Neither are You

As I ponder my late life discovery that I am transgender, I have regularly felt a disconnect with being “normal”. I experienced a profound internal conflict as I sensed an increasing detachment to those around me. I was becoming an outsider.

When I was normal, my life was simpler. I was accepted by family and friends. I knew what was expected of me and I was OK with it. I was so indoctrinated with rules of the Baby Boomer generation that I forgot that they were there, inside me. Being binary was OK. Now I have been thrust into this very odd world that has placed me outside the “NORM”. I have suddenly asked myself:

What is normal?

Normal is also used to describe individual behavior that conforms to the most common behavior in society (known as conformity). Definitions of normality vary by person, time, place, and situation — it changes along with changing societal standards and norms.

So, if normal varies by person, time, place, and situation, then by simply walking a distance from where you are now, normal changes. Knock on your neighbor’s door and ask them to define “normal” and it will be different than yours. Sure, you will find some commonality but you will also find many differences.

That brings us to social norms. Social norms are regarded as collective representations of…