Member-only story
The Invisible Woman
I had a painful experience today. I was scheduled for a holiday makeover. While I am stealth it has been the only physical connection with Emma other than my breasts. It has become increasingly important as time passes because my male constant doubt is always waiting for any opportunity to club my sense of female gender. Seeing a photo of Emma, who is always smiling at the camera, always slaps away any doubt with a gentle wave of her hand. She never needs a club.
Unfortunately, my appointment was cancelled literally at the last minute due to Covid. It is hard to explain how disappointed I was and what a deep funk it put me into. I tried to do Emma things. I went shopping in the women’s section of various department stores. That didn’t help. Since I am not officially out, I have no need to continue to buy clothes that I can’t wear yet and have no room for.
It was just another tease.
I tried to rally by walking into Sephora. Makeup takes up little room and having a saleswoman who knows that you are transgender has made the experience in the past special… but nope I walked in totally male but to all the female clerk I was completely invisible. As I strolled the very large store, walking down every aisle, the clerks breezed by me and attacked every solo woman as if they were valuable financial prey. I continued to walk the store in increasing depression for…
